"Making Hot, Sweaty Love": Jens Söring releases an XXX-rated Audiobook

It's about the woman he's still obsessed with almost 40 years later.

Jens Söring has just released an audiobook on the self-publishing website Xinxii. It is read by the man himself.

In the introduction, he says the upcoming Netflix series doesn’t pay enough attention to his “love affair” with Elizabeth, so he whipped up this audiobook — in English and German — to fill out the picture a little. It contains graphic sex scenes. The title of this post comes from Söring’s account of how Elizabeth and he spent their evenings while on the run in Thailand.

In audiobook, Söring repeats a tactic he used in his 2017 book A Far, Far Better Thing: Portraying Elizabeth Haysom as a sex-crazed Jezebel who used her sexy sexiness to manipulate shy, virginal Jens into taking the blame for her murders. Söring says of one of their first encounters: “She wanted to sleep with me, immediately. This of course was far too much for my virgin nerves to handle. I sent Elizabeth to her room and went to mine alone, almost faint from the shock.”

Here’s an excerpt from my book Martyr or Murderer?, which you can pre-order on any Amazon site (just the Kindle version is available now, more versions, including a paperback for $18.99, coming soon):

The first half of [A Far, Far Better Thing] is a reworked version of Mortal Thoughts, complete with references to Elizabeth playing her “piper’s magic tune” and comparisons of her to an “evil spider” who had Söring wrapped up in “a little cocoon, ready for consumption”. Söring also keeps the splendid anecdote about sex-mad Elizabeth staging a public “wrestling match over [his] penis” in a bar, forcing him to plead with her to “relinquish her hold on my member”. Söring then quotes three full pages from an extremely sexually explicit letter she had written to him over three decades previously, advising readers they may wish to skip it because of its “pornographic nature”. How, the reader wonders, could Söring possibly have resisted the will of this female Rasputin?

The letter, which Söring quotes in full, almost 800 words, is full of references to tongues, juices, and crevices, “my aching hole”. You get the idea. In the audiobook, Söring reads Haysom’s 40-year-old sex fantasies in a slightly distorted voice intended to show he’s quoting Elizabeth.

This pretty much speaks for itself, so I will end with three short observations: (1) Söring is still obsessed with Elizabeth — thank God they now live on separate continents; (2) Söring is still flogging the innocence story; and (3) Jens Söring has no class.